


Unexpected

by bredawn



Category: None - Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-10
Updated: 2013-03-10
Packaged: 2017-12-04 20:02:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/714530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bredawn/pseuds/bredawn





	Unexpected

"Let go of me, Let go!" I broke free from his grip and ran faster than I've ever ran before.  
"You won't stay away for long! You'll come back! I'll find you!" I kept running, ignoring him.  
"You'll regret this!" He screamed.  
It was getting difficult to see, tears streaming down my face. I fought the urge to just give up. I couldn't stop running, not as long as I heard his voice. He ran after me for about ten minutes, but gave up. I kept going. I didn't care how long it took, how out of breath I was, I wasn't giving up. I couldn't. I still heard him screaming my name. About twenty minutes had passed before I realized he was gone. I collapsed. I felt like I was suffocating. I couldn't breathe. Everything went dark.

I woke up somewhere I didn't recognize, everything was blurry. I could hear muffled voices around me. My chest and throat burned. I still couldn't breathe. It went dark again.  
"Can you hear me? What's your name? Do you know what happened to you? Hello?"  
I heard their voices, and tried to answer, but words couldn't seem to escape my lips. It was still dark. I felt like someone had their hands wrapped around my throat. I struggled to breathe. Every breath took more energy than I had. Then everything went quiet.

I woke up to an empty room, just the sound of beeping echoing in the room. I tried to sit up, but gasped. The pain in my ribs was throbbing.  
"I wouldn't be trying to move too much, you look pretty beat up. And one of your ribs are broken." I heard a woman's voice say. I found her at the door on the other side of the room. "Glad you're awake." She smiled.  
"Where am I?" I whispered.  
"A hospital in Winchester." She walked towards me. "You look exhausted. Try to rest." She said gently, and left the room." Something about her, made her feel a little familiar, like I've seen her before but I couldn't tell where. I've never seen her before. Yet, every time she looked at me she had this facial expression. Sad, wonder, curiosity maybe. I couldn't place it.  
The room was brighter than before. The sun beaming through the window. I saw a doctor beside me, replacing an IV bag.  
"You feeling any better?" He asked. I nodded. "A little." I replied. My throat wasn't burning so much anymore. The same nurse came back in and looked at me with sympathetic eyes, a look you see a mother give to a crying child. She had curly blonde hair and green eyes. She wore a name tag, but I could hardly see it.  
"How is she?" She asked the doctor, as if I wasn't right there in front of her. He smiled.  
"She looks better than when she came in, and says she feels a little better."  
"That's great." She said. Her voice was soft. She looked kind of sad, but I couldn't quite figure out why.  
"Do you need anything?"  
I shook my head. The doctor left.  
"Don't you have a parent around to come pick you up?" I looked away and then back at her.  
"I have a dad, but I kind of ran away."  
"Oh, may I ask why?"  
I shrugged. "I got tired of fighting with him, every day was constant arguing, and he wouldn't let me see this guy."  
She nodded and laughed a little bit. "It usually has to do with a boy huh?" I smiled a small smile.  
"Yeah, I guess." The room got quiet for a few minutes until I decided to break the silence with a question that probably wasn't my business.  
"Do you have any children?" She paused. Like she had to think about it.  
"Sorry, it isn't my business." She shook her head.  
"No, don't worry about it. I had a child, yes. But she lives with her dad now, he didn't want me around anymore." She tried to force a smile. "But I believe she is living a wonderful life with her father. He wasn't too bad of a guy. He just never really knew quite what he wanted."  
I laughed. "I know what that's like. I'm sorry though, about your daughter. Do you miss her?"  
She nodded. "Terribly. She was just a baby when I left, and every second I've spent away from her has tortured me. I feel like there's this piece of me missing, and I may never get it back."  
In a way, I felt like I understood exactly how she felt, but different. "I never met my mom. Dad says she ran off, but I think he probably pushed her away. He tends to do that."  
"You blame your father for not having a mom?"  
I shrugged. "I guess, kind of."  
She shook her head and walked towards me. "Have you asked him?"  
"Well, of course. But he won't talk about it. It's as if it's this huge secret."  
She shook her head again. "Well, that just isn't right." She said quietly. She moved my hair away from my face. "You get some rest. I'll talk to you later." She smiled.  
"Is there someone we can call for you?" The doctor asked when he came back a few hours later. I couldn't stop thinking about the conversation I had with the nurse.  
I shook my head. "I'll call my friend to come get me." I said quietly. I was not going to call my father, not after everything that had happened. He'd just scream at me for leaving. He nodded and handed me the phone from the bedside table. After he left the room I stared at the phone. I knew who I wanted to call, but I wasn't sure if it was a good idea. At this point though, I didn't really have a choice. I slowly dialed his number and took a deep breath, waiting for the phone to ring. It felt like forever before he finally answered. I paused, breathed, then spoke. "Matt, it's me. Christal."  
"Chris? Where are you? Where have you been? Me and Briah have been so worried. Are you alright?"  
"Yeah, I guess. I need you to do me a favor."  
He sighed. "Not unless you come home."  
"Matt, that's the thing. I'm in Winchester. I know it's a lot to ask but-"  
"I'm on my way, just tell me where you are."  
After hanging up, I put the phone on the table and stared at the floor. A million thoughts going through my mind. Sleep shouldn't have been so easy.  
My eyes opened to complete darkness, out of breath. My chest burning again. My throat was hurting again. "Are you okay?" I heard a soft voice say. It was the nurse from earlier. "Yeah, bad dream." I whispered. She looked at me sympathetically. "You need anything?" I shook my head. "I'm fine, thanks." She nodded. "Just call for me if you change your mind." She was kind of mother-like, looking at me as if seeing her own child. Tortured by the bruises surrounding my face and body. Every time she looked at me, I saw sadness. I wanted to ask her what was wrong, but I just couldn't quite find the right words.  
The sun gleaming into the window woke me up. I slowly turned over and noticed a figure leaning against the door. "What happened to you?" I could recognize his voice anywhere. "Hey, Matt." He smiled a little bit. "Hey, how are you feeling?" I shrugged. "Better." He walked over and sat next to me on my bed. He rubbed his hand over my cheek. "What happened, Chris? What is this from?" He was talking about the bruises. I ignored his question. I didn't want to talk about it here. I looked away. He nodded. "Okay, you don't have to talk about it, I won't make you." I looked at him again. "Thanks." He smiled. "You ready to go?" I nodded. "You have no idea." "I'll be right back then." I watched as he walked out of the room, and saw him talking to a nurse.  
He came back with a bag in his hand and a bottle of pills. He threw the bag onto my bed. "Get dressed. We're leaving." I just stared at him. "Well, come on. We don't have all day." I rolled my eyes and opened the bag. "A dress?" He smiled. "Sorry, it was the fastest choice." "Great." I mumbled. "I'll be out in the hallway. Try to make it quick.  
"So where are we going?" I asked Matt as we got into the car. "Nowhere yet. We'll stay in a hotel for a few nights til you're okay to actually do something. Then, I know exactly where we can go." I looked at him, confused. "Wait, so you're not taking me home?" "Not right away." "Thanks." He nodded. "Of course."  
The rest of the car ride was pretty quiet, besides the hum of the radio playing. I stared out of the window most of the time, and caught Matt glance over at me every couple of minutes. I knew why, but I still wasn't going to tell him anything yet. I didn't even want to think about it, but that was difficult. I was starting to have dreams about it. "You okay?" His question interrupted my thoughts. "Yeah, I'm fine." He looked worried, but I assurred him I'm alright. I'm sure he didn't buy it, but he didn't bother me about it.  
We got to an expensive looking hotel, and Matt checked us in. There was only one bedroom in the room we got, so he said he'd sleep on the couch. I walked into the room, set my bag down, and walked to the bathroom which was probably a big mistake. I looked into the mirror. Suddenly everything flooded back, and I was on the floor, crying uncontrollably. Matt rushed into the room. "Chris? What happened? What's wrong?" He knelt onto the floor and pulled me to his chest. "It's okay. You're okay." He whispered. I felt stupid for the way I kept crying. I hated it. Soon Matt helped me to the bed and gave me some water. "I wish you'd talk to me." He said quietly as he sat next to me. "I can't." I whispered. But after days and nights of nightmares, and breakdowns, I figure it was time to talk.  
"Come on, let's go somewhere." "I can't, I have to go home. I'm already late. My dad is going to kill me." "You're always late, it won't make a difference." "Trev, I can't." "Whatever." He said. Sometimes I thought he acted more like a girl than I did. "He already told me I'm not even supposed to see you anymore. Do you really wanna make it worse?" He crossed his arms. "Oh come on. Look, I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow okay?" "Sure." I turned to walk away and he grabbed my arm. "What are you doing? I have to go." "No you don't. You're such a liar." "Ugh, I don't have time for this." He pulled me closer. "Just stay. Please." He said through clenched teeth. "No, I can't." "Yes you can." I sighed. I pulled my arm away from him. "I really need to get going. I hope you're in a better mood tomorrow. Goodbye." He swung me around with both arms and grasped them tighter. I couldn't move away. "Don't talk to me like that. Got it?" He pushed me away from him and I fell to the ground. He walked away.  
"Where were you? You are an hour late." he said as I closed the front door. "With Trevor. Where else would I be?" "I told you not to see him anymore." "You can't tell me who I can and can't be with." I demanded. My father never liked him, but I didn't care. "Where are those bruises from? Did he do that to you?" He pointed to my arms. "No, I fell. Okay? I'm going upstairs. Goodnight." "You're not going to see him anymore." He yelled up to me." "You can't stop me!" "Grounding you can stop you." He said as he came up the stairs after me. "Sure." I replied. He grabbed my arm and leaded me to my room. "You are not leaving this house until I say you can. Got it?" He demanded. "You can't stop me from leaving." I said quietly after he slammed my door and walked back downstairs. My phone started ringing. "Yeah?" "Sorry." Trevor mumbled. "I didn't mean to hurt you." "You didn't." I lied. My arms felt like someone threw rocks at them. "Okay. Did your dad yell at you for being late?" "Yeah, he said I'm not allowed to leave the house." "He can't do that." I could hear the anger in his voice. "Don't worry, he never goes through with it. He can't punish me. He's never been able to." "Sure." He said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?" "Alright." I hung up the phone and headed to my bed. I needed to sleep off today.  
"Where do you think you're going?" My dad asked as I started to walk towards the door. "Out." He got up and stood in front of me. "I told you, you're not going anywhere." "And I told you, you can't stop me." I started to push through him but he grabbed my arm and dragged me up the stairs. "Let go of me!" I yelled. He pushed me into my room and locked the door. Then he walked back downstairs. I stood in my room, angry at my father. He can't just lock me up in my room. Suddenly, a thought popped in my head. He won't get away with this. I opened my window, and for the first time, climbed out. I went to the park to meet up with Trevor, and came back around midnight. My dad didn't seem to suspect anything so for the next few nights I did the same thing. This night however, changed. Because this time when I headed up to my window, it was closed. I peeked through and saw my door open. My dad caught me. [I guess I should've expected it. I mean, when do you teenagers ever get away with anything for long?] I climbed back down the ladder, and slowly turned the door knob. My dad was casually sitting down on the couch holding a newspaper. "Have fun with your boyfriend tonight?" I shrugged. "Good, 'cause it's your last." He set the paper down. "From now on you won't be leaving my sight. You'll be treated like the four year old you're acting like. I will be checking in on you randomly, and you will come get your own food whenever I call you to. Whether you want to or not. When I go to work, the neighbor will watch you. You are on complete supervision. Wanna act like a toddler? Now you are one." I crossed my arms. "You can't control me." "Obviously I can." He said. "Now, time for bed." I rolled my eyes and headed up the stairs. I tried to open the window, but he glued it shut. I sighed. I couldn't believe he was doing this.  
Every day was just like he said it would be. He woke me up at eight o'clock for breakfast, and besides food, I was to stay in my room. If he had to leave, the neighbor was there doing watching me. He didn't let me sleep until ten and I wasn't allowed to talk or have any contact with anyone. I wanted out. So, one day my dad left and the neighbor who was watching me went downstairs. I waited a few minutes and headed to my dads room. Searching for my cell phone. I found it in his top drawer of his end table. I grabbed it and snuck downstairs to the door, and quietly left. I called Trevor to let him know where to meet me and to hurry.  
"Is everything okay?" He asked the moment he saw me. "Yeah, I guess. I just needed out of that house. He had me locked up like some kind of criminal." He wrapped his arms around my waist. "Trevor, I just came to say bye." He let go. "What are you talking about?" "I want to find my mother. I'm going to go look for her." "No way, you can't just run off on some mission you can't even figure out." "I have to try." I said quietly. "I need to meet her." He nodded. "Let me help." I looked up at him. "What?" "Let me help. Please, Chris? I can't let you do this alone. I can help you." I shrugged. "I don't know-" He grabbed my hands. "You can't just leave me. I know how to help you, just let me help you." "Okay." I whispered.  
The drive to Winchester took a few hours. Trevor said he had a place there where we could stay while we figured everything out. It was his grandparents old house. He had a few friends there also. He'd go out and see them every few days, and sometimes they'd come over. Occasionally I forgot why we were even there. One day we were lying on the couch when I brought it up. "Do you think we'll find her?" I asked. "Who?" "My mother." He shrugged. "I think it's possible." "I hope so." I whispered.  
I woke up to an empty house and a note on the coffee table. went out to get breakfast, be back later. love you. I put the note down and walked over to the laptop that was on the desk on the far wall. I started to search online for her, but didn't have much luck. Then, when Trevor came back he looked at me like he was confused. "What are you doing?" "Searching for places my mother could be at." He pulled out the food from the paper bag and set it on the counter. "Come eat." I nodded. "One second." I want to try to search at least one more place. About ten minutes later he started to get impatient. "Are you going to eat or not?" "Alright, I'm coming." I told him. But when I didn't go fast enough he charged over and shut the laptop. I looked at him. "What was that for?" "Take a break, you need to eat." I slowly walked to the table, and we ate in silence. I didn't understand why he'd reacted like that. Later that night after we crawled into bed, he turned to me. "Chris?" "Yeah?" "We'll look for your mom tomorrow okay? I promise." "Okay." I said with a smile.  
When I woke up he was already out of the room. I thought he was getting ready for our search. "Are we going this early?" He paused. "Oh, uh, no. I have to go for a little bit. But we will when I get back." He kissed my forehead and walked out of the door. I stood in the kitchen, wondering what to do. I couldn't exactly go out on my own, I didn't know where anything was, and didn't have a car. I did more research online but still, found nothing. I fell asleep on the couch, and then suddenly the door opening woke me up. I looked at the clock. It was nine. "I'm so sorry Christal. I just got caught up. Tomorrow though." I nodded. "Sure." He smiled, ignoring my comment. The next few days were pretty much the same. He'd leave, come back, apologize, and say we'll look for her tomorrow. I didn't believe him anymore. So the next time he left, I grabbed a map and caught a cab. I had to find the hospital I was born in. It was on the other side of Winchester, but it was worth a try. It took about half an hour, but I was there. I told the driver to wait, and headed inside. I hesitated at the desk, the lady staring at me. "Can I help you?" "Uh, yeah. I'm trying to find someone who might have had a baby here a few years ago." "We can't give out that information." "She's my mother." I said barely before she finished her sentence. She paused. "Were you adopted?" I shook my head. She told me that she'd never normally do something like this, and pulled out some folders. We searched for hours and didn't find anything. "I'm sorry. I wish I could've helped." She said sympathetically. "It's fine." I told her. When I went back outside it was dark, and the driver was gone. Not surprising, I had been gone for hours. Luckily, another drove up and let me inside. He was more friendly than the last and talked to me the whole way back to the house. When I got there, I noticed Trevors car in the driveway. Crap. This won't be good. The moment I walked inside I felt the tension in the room. "Where have you been?" He demanded. "Searching." He grabbed me by the arm. "I told you we'd both look for her together. Just not today." "You say that every day but we never do. I'm not just going to sit around and waste time waiting for you when I came here to find my mother." He jerked my arm, pulling me towards him. "You don't leave this house without me, got it?" I didn't reply. "Got it?" He demanded again, squeezing my arm. "Let go of me." I demanded. He let go, pushing me backwards. I wished he'd stop doing that. He went straight to the bedroom, without saying another word. I slept in the bedroom next door, not wanting to be near him.  
The next morning when I went into the bathroom, I looked in the mirror and noticed a bruise the size of a tennis ball on my arm. I sighed. "Wonderful." I said to myself. "What is?" Trevor over heard me. I turned to him and pointed to my arm. "What you did to my arm. He walked towards me and rubbed his hand over it. I flinched. It hurt to touch. "I'm sorry." He said quietly. "It's fine." I whispered. He kissed me, and then headed out the door. "Where are you going?" He smiled. "Gotta go get some food. I'll be back in about an hour. Don't move. Okay?" I nodded. Little did I know, that he'd come back angry. "Hey, took you long enough." I joked. He ignored me. "What's wrong?" He shook his head. "Nothing." I sat next to him. "Something is obviously bothering you, what is it?" "Just leave me alone, okay?" I shook my head. "Okay." I said quietly. I went back to the kitchen and made something to eat since he didn't come back with anything. "You left again didn't you?" Suddenly he was behind me. "What are you talking about?" "You know perfectly well what I am talking about!" He screamed. I backed away from him. "I haven't gone anywhere. I've been here all day waiting for you." "Yeah, whatever." I rolled my eyes and turned to walk past him. "I'll talk to you when you feel better." I snapped at him. He grabbed hold of the hood of my sweatshirt and yanked me back. "No, you'll talk to me when I say you'll talk to me." "What is going on with you?" I yelled. "Who have you become? Geez Trevor, I knew you could be a jerk, but never like this. Let go of me. Now." I demanded. He glared at me with a challenging look and then let go. I went to the extra bedroom and got dressed to leave. But when I started to leave to the door, he blocked me. "You're not going anywhere." "Trevor, move." He pushed me away from the door. "I told you, you are not going anywhere." "I'm leaving." I told him. But he wouldn't accept that. He grabbed my arm and dragged me towards one of the rooms. He held the door closed, I couldn't move the door knob. I tried to get out of the window but it was stuck. "Let me out of here!" I screamed. I was pounding on the door for hours, until I just gave up. I fell asleep.  
When I woke up I noticed it was really quiet. I peeked underneath the door and didn't see anything. I slowly turned the door knob, and made my way out. I got out of the front door, and then his car pulled up. He grabbed ahold of both my arms and slammed me against the brick wall. I tried to fight him off, but he pushed me to the ground, and started kicking. Finally I stood up, and before I got the chance to move he grabbed ahold of me again. I screamed at him to let go, and finally had enough strength to at least pull my arms free, and I ran.

 

 

Matt pulled me to him, "I'm so sorry, Chris." He whispered. I shook my head. "No, it wasn't your fault." He took his sleeve and wiped away a tear I didn't even notice was on my cheek. I put my head on his shoulder. "Just don't leave again, okay?" He nodded. "I promise. He's never going to hurt you again." I closed my eyes. "I hope not."  
"So where are we headed to now?" I asked. We'd been in the hotel for about a week. Now we were finally leaving. He looked like he knew what he was doing. Like he had something planned. "Well, it depends. Do you wanna go home right away? Or take a little extra time?" He smiled. He knew what my answer was, I didn't even have to say it. "Take as much time as you want. I'm probably in a lot of trouble anyway." I got to the car and waited for him. When we got in he turned on the radio and smiled at me. "So where are we going?" "You'll see." He said. I looked at him suspiciously and he grinned. "It's a surprise. Just trust me." I hoped we weren't going to be in the car for too long. I always hated road trips. Being cramped in a car was never something I enjoyed. "Before we go though, let's eat." He said. "I know a great place around here." I stared out the window. "Are you okay?" He asked in a concerned voice. I looked at him with a small smile. "Yeah, I'm fine." I knew he could tell I was lying, but he wasn't going to push me to talk about it. He'd wait until I decided to tell him. Just like he always did. That's what I loved about him.  
We walked into the restaurant and got seated at one of the window seats. "So, what will it be?" He asked. "Chris?" "What if he finds me? What if he's at my house waiting for me? I don't want to see him again." He grabbed my hand from across the table. "Christal, look at me. He won't hurt you again. I'll make sure of it. I'm right here. I'm always here. I'm not going anywhere." I knew he meant it. He always did whatever he could to protect me. But it wasn't his job to do anything about it. If I told him that though, he'd tell me the same thing he always did. It's his job to make sure I'm okay. I nodded and realized he had both my hands. For once, it wasn't weird, or awkward, it was actually comfortable. The waitress came soon after and handed us our food. Part of me was relieved someone interrupted, but another part wished they didn't. I couldn't figure out why, but I didn't think too much about it.  
Something about the way he looked at me today told me that he was hiding something, or he wanted to tell me something. Maybe I'm being selfish. I don't think I've asked him once how he's feeling, how he's been. I just knew he was worried. Maybe there was something going on with him that he hasn't told me yet. I saw him coming back in the room and wondered what he was thinking. He came in and smiled at me. "How are you feeling?" He asked me. "Fine. What about you?" I wanted to see if I could get whatever he was hiding out of him. "Good." "Are you sure?" He looked confused. "Yeah, I'm sure. Why?" He was always hard to read, difficult to figure out. I didn't know if I should say anything. I felt like I had to say something but I didn't know how or what exactly to say, so I stayed quiet. Maybe he'll tell me later. "Just checking." I replied. "There's a place I wanna go to. We aren't staying here. You'll like it, trust me." He said. He looked happy about it. I laughed a little bit. "Alright, when do we leave?" He shrugged. "Tomorrow morning."  
That night I had another nightmare. I woke up screaming and in tears again. I was sick of these dreams. Matt woke up and held me, he said not to worry it. "It's just a bad dream." He told me. "Well I'm tired of them!" I yelled. "I know, But they'll go away. It'll just take some time." He said it calmly, almost like he's talking to a child. It was kind of annoying, but at the same time didn't bother me, because it just showed he cared. He eventually got me to go back to sleep, and I woke up the next morning with my head on his chest. I was confused, it wasn't something that I would normally do, he was my best friend. But for some reason, it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. He started to wake up and I quickly sat up. He laughed. I looked at him confused. What was he laughing about? "What? Are you afraid your parents are gonna walk in and think something?" He teased. "No, I just- I need something to eat." I smiled. "Sure." He said. He looked a little disappointed. Like I might've said something wrong. "Let's go eat then." He said and stood up. That's when I realized there really was somethin wrong. I just couldn't see it. It felt like I should know, But I didn't.  
The car ride to where ever we were going took longer than usual. We passed a lot of restaurants and and I asked where we were going but he just stayed quiet. We eventually ended up by a lake. No one was there. There were no houses, no people. Just trees and some picnic tables. He parked the car close to the grass and then got out. Then he walked to the trunk and pulled out a blanket and a basket. I never saw those before now, Was he planning this? Maybe that's what he was doing yesterday before he came in. "Did you plan this?" I asked. He smiled. "Yup, I guess I'm pretty good at being sneaky." He laughed. "Chris, I'm not mad at you, I know you think I am. But I have no reason to be." How did he know I thought he was mad at me? Am I that easy to read? "Good." I said. We walked towards the lake, in the grass where the ground was flat and there were a few trees around us like a circle. We used to do this all the time, by the lake around our neighborhood. It was our time to spend together, just as friends, enjoying the day. We'd run around and laugh, and joke. We always had fun. It stopped after he started College. "I thought it'd be nice to go back to the way things used to be. I've missed our picnic lunches." He smiled. "It was always my favorite part of the day. I can't believe we just let them end." I was a little surprised. I never knew it meant so much to him. I smiled. "Yeah, I've missed it too." I said quietly. He layed out the blanket and set everything up, It might not have been in the same place, but it was just like before everything changed. He was the only person I could be myself around and the best friend I've ever had. "You gonna come sit down?" He asked interrupting my thoughts. "I'm not sure, You're kinda crazy." I teased. He laughed. "I'll show you crazy." He threw a grape at me and then ran. "Really?" I ran after him. "Yup. What are you gonna do about it?" He yelled. "Well I have quite a few options. There's a lake right behind you, you know." I said as I caught up with him. "You wouldn't." He said in a daring voice. "I wouldn't be so sure of that." I said and ran to push him in but he caught me and then jumped in the water. I splashed water at him. "Oh, you're gonna start that now are you?" "Yes, yes I am." I laughed. I swam away and before I climbed out of the water he popped out of the water and grabbed my waist, yanking me back in. "Where do you think you're going? I haven't gotten you back yet." He smiled. "Well, What are you waiting for then?" He climbed out of the water. "You'll see." He ran off again and hid, but I didn't see where. I walked slowly towards the picnic blanket. Before I even got close he jumped out from behind a tree, flung his arms around my waist and squeezed me. I wiggled around. "Let me go." I laughed. I was facing him now. My face only inches from his. After staring at each other for a few seconds he kissed me. I was speechless. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He walked off and started cleaning everything up. "We should probably go." I just stood there and watched as he got everything in the car. What just happened? After he finished getting everything in the car, he got in the drivers seat and waited for me. The whole car ride back was completely quiet. Making it a little awkward. He wouldn't even look at me. Our whole relationship was going to be so much different now. What would happen to us now? What if I lose him? I didn't want to lose him. I looked at him. He looked upset, or worried. He kept his eyes forward. He was mumbling to himself but I couldn't hear it. He stopped and parked in a driveway. I didn't recognize the place, but I saw the little cabin and assumed that it was the place he was talking about earlier. He got his keys out of his pocket and we walked to the door. After he unlocked the door we both went inside and he set his keys and cell phone down on the table next to the couch, and then turned to walk out again. "I'll be right back. Anybody calls, just tell them I'm busy." He said and left. I sat on the couch closest to the window. I watched as he walked towards the car. He just sat there, against the hood of the car. His phone started going off, and a text popped up. "She's right where you want her, Do it. Before it's too late. What's the worst that could happen? For all she knows you're just being a good friend. Is that really what you want?" What was this? What does it mean? Was all of this a game? Matt wouldn't do that. I stood there, frozen in thought. I could hear the start of rain beating on the window. The same person texted again. "Are you gonna do it or what? You don't have much time. If you don't before you leave you'll regret it I know you will." This can't be right, what were these texts about? I had to find out. I opened the door and walked towards him. "What's going on Matt?" I asked him. "What are you talking about?" "Your phone. What does he mean in this text?" He grabbed the phone from my hand. "What were you doing reading my texts?" "I wasn't. You told me to answer if someon calls. It went off, I looked at it. But that isn't the point. What is it about?" He looked back up at me. "Nothing. Just forget about it." "No. I will not just forget about it, I need to know what this is about." "No you don't." He said. "I'm sick of this Matt. You're hiding something, I can tell. You just won't tell me. We used to tell each other everything. What happened?" He leaned back against the car again and looked down at the ground. "Nothing happened. I just can't tell you." He was starting to annoy me. I just wanted to know. Why won't he tell me? "Yes you can, and I don't understand why you won't. What are you hiding? Why can't you tell me?" "Because I just can't!" He yelled. "You're so stubborn! You've never been good at being honest have you?" Maybe that was the wrong thing for me to say, I could tell by his face. "Oh, like you're so perfect. You were stupid enough to run off with some guy you hardly knew, just because you got mad at your father. We wouldn't even be here if you would've just used your head for once." "What else was I supposed to do? Go to you? What would be the point in that? To get cut out of your life again? To get lectured for leaving? and sent back to where I didn't want to be?" "I never cut you out of my life. That was you. And I'd never do that. I would've taken care of you. You know that." "No I don't." I mumbled. "What are you trying to say? You don't think I care? I didn't come all the way here for no reason Christal." "Then what was your reason Matthew? Do you even know? Was this all just some stupid act?" "Of course not. Who do you think I am? I thought you trusted me." "I did, but now I'm not so sure. I mean you won't even explain one text. You're hiding something, Matt. Something important. Do you think I'm stupid? You used to always tbe honest with me. What happened to you? Who are you anymore? Because you're definitely not the Matt I used to know. I wish I knew what changed you." "Nothing! Nothing changed me! That thing you used to call your boyfriend changed YOU! But you're too stubborn to realize it. It's you who chaned, not me." I fought back tears. "No." I whispered. "You were so convinced that he was so...perfect. You wouldn't listen to anyone. Not even ME! You got in your head that I was this horrible guy because for once, I didn't agree with you. You pushed me away. You were so caught up in finding the right guy that you didn't think even for one second that maybe just maybe he was right in front of you! He could've passed you a thousand times and you wouldn't notice, because that idiot filled your head with crap." "What are you trying to say? I know I made a mistake okay? You don't think I regret it? You don't think I cared? I've always cared. You didn't exactly care much when you walked away, when you gave up." "I cared more than you ever could! More than you'd think..." He started walking back towards the cabin. "Why did you come back? If I was so horrible, If you were that mad at me, Why did you come back?" He paused. "Why did you come? To get an apology? Fine, I'm sorry. To change everything? What was it?" He turned around but didn't move, or speak. "What brought you back to such a horrible person?" "You just don't get it." He said quietly. "Get what? You just told me-" "I love you!" I stopped talking, and looked at him, confused. "What?" I said quietly. "I always have, like I said, you're too stubborn to see it." I didn't know what to say. "Don't worry, I know you don't feel the same way. Which is why I never told you." He walked inside, and this time I didn't stop him. I stayed frozen in shock. That's why he acted that way with me. Why didn't I see it? I can't believe this...  
"Christal? I'm sorry." I heard him say. I thought he went inside, but I guess he turnd around again. He got a little closer but not too much, he was trying to keep the distance. "Chris?" I looked at him. I couldn't say anything. "I understand if you're mad at me, I really do. But please come inside, so you don't get sick." I wanted to tell him that I wasn't mad at him. That I was sorry too. But no words came out of my mouth. I nodded and walked inside. The next morning nobody said a word. It was completely quiet. Soon we'd be going home, not that I was exactly ready to face my father, and Matt would go back to school. What then? Is it going to stay like this? I don't want to lose him. I can't. "We'll start heading home tomorrow." He said quietly. I nodded and continued eating my breakfast. I didn't want to go, but I didn't exactly want to stay either. I didn't want things to stay this way, I wanted them to get better again. I wanted to go back to yesterday morning. I wasn't ready to lose Matt. But I knew I was. After breakfast we sat around watching T.V. We'd look at each other every once in a while, but didn't say a word. He'd turn away the moment I caught him. Like he had committed a crime by looking my direction. I started to think he regretted telling me he loves me, but why should that mean he should act like this towards me? Why do things have to go like this? Maybe things will change. Maybe they will (eventually) get better. Maybe. I'd see him get up occasionally, back and forth from the kitchen to the living room. To the pond outside a few times. But he never did anything. He wouldn't even look at me either. How long will this go on? I can't stand it. I fell asleep after a while, watching him skip rocks across the pond. I woke up to a bunch of rustling around and I was in a bed instead of the couch I fell asleep on. I smiled. He does still care. I looked over and saw him packing up. "We're leaving already?" "I told you we were leaving today." He said in an annoyed voice. "Well, Yeah, but I didn't think you meant first thing in the morning." "Well I did." He said. He left the room and I just stared at the door. I wish none of this ever happened. I wish things would just stop changing. I want things back to how they used to be, before I ran away, before I pushed Matt away... But I ruined everything. I will fix this, I have to try. I got all my things packed and walked to the car. Once he got in he drove off. Considering we're going to be stuck in the car for a few hours, this could be the right time to talk about it. "Are we going to go on like this forever Matt? Or can we please just talk about it?" "There's nothing to talk about." "How about the fact that you've been avoiding me ever since that stupid fight? Or how you're acting like a child? What about the fact that I haven't done anything wrong and you're acting like I've committed some kind of murder or something?" "Christal, I don't want to talk about this, Alright? Just leave it alone." "No. I won't just leave it alone. We can't go on like this, We need to talk about it. I can't just ignore it." I argued. "I said I don't want to talk about it, so stop trying to make me!" He yelled. I looked out the window and felt a tear slip down my cheek. "I'm sorry." I whispered. I heard him mumble something but he kept his eyes on the road in front of him. I guess I was wrong. Maybe it was never going to get better. This is the end. I ruined everything.  
As he pulled into my driveway I had two thoughts. How is my dad going to react when I walk in the door, and is this the last time I'll see Matt? "Thanks, Matt. For everything." I told him as I opened the car door. "Goodbye Christal." I nodded and got out of the car. "Bye." I said quietly and shut the door.  
I stood frozen in my driveway as he drove away. As I watched his car speed down the street, tears threatened my eyes. I looked at my house, it looked dark, almost abandoned. The truck wasn't in the driveway, I guessed it was in the garage. I walked slowly to the door, and hesitated. Then, I turned the door knob. I walked in and nobody was there. Where was he? I set my bag down on the floor in the hallway and walked to the kitchen. I hadn't eaten all day so I raided the cabinets for food and looked around for my dad. But he wasn't there. I grabbed a pop tart from the cabinet and picked my bag back up, then headed upstairs to my room. I took off my jacket, sat down on my bed, and turned on the t.v. I wondered where my dad went. Will he be back? He's probably going to kill me. I layed down and covered with my blanket.  
I woke up to my mirror shaking. My dad was home. I quickly got up, turned off the t.v, and ran down to the stairs. I peeked over the railing and saw him staring at my bag, looking...relieved. I slowly walked down the stairs and looked at him, trying not to make too much noise. He was actually worried, he actually cared. He saw me. "Chris?" He whispered with a hint of tears in his eyes. "You're home." "Yeah, I'm home." I said, and smiled a little bit. "Take your stuff upstairs and off this floor." He walked into the living room and I heard the T.V turn on. I grabbed my bag and went back upstairs. "Or not..." I whispered.  
As soon as I woke up, I didn't bother to change out of my sweats and tank top, I grabbed a jacket, a pop tart, and shoes and headed out to the trail that led the the lake. The woods were quiet, empty, kind of creepy. I rememebered running through these same woods with Matt, racing to the lake. I found the bench we used to sit at when we came here in the past. It looked a little...sad. Leaning a little to the left. The tree beside it brought back even more memories. Our initials were still there. I was ten, he was eleven. He used to love showing off the one year difference between us. Acting like since he's older he knew everything, and in a way, he did. He always knew what to say. He never allowed me to be upset. If I ever got upset about anything he'd always find a way to make it better. One day I was upset because my favorite dolls arm broke and he ran all over town just to find someone to fix it. Since my dad was always busy and I didn't have a mom, he was like my big brother. He was always there, when nobody else was. Or when Briah was out of town. I always ran to him. I can't believe it's just over. After seven years. It's all just...gone. Done. We'll never be the same. I remembered one day he came to walk me home from school, we went to different schools and he'd leave early just to walk with me, he caught some kids pushing me around and calling me names, and he scared them away. By seventh grade people left me alone. He promised he'd never give up, He'd always protect me.  
I took a nap by the water, and thought most of day, never moving. It was at sunset when I realized I should probably head home. When I walked in the door I heard my dad walking and I hid behind the doorway. "She probably hates me, What if she ran away again? What if I lost her?" There was a short pause. "No, I know she won't. I messed up. I should have been more of a father to her..." I couldn't believe this. I never knew he felt this way. Maybe something can get better. "Okay, thanks. Yeah, tomorrow. Bye." He sounded...sad. I heard him put the phone back on the wall and sit down. Now it's my turn to really fix something. I walked slowly around the corner, into the living room. He had his face in his hands, but he wasn't crying. "Dad?" I said quietly as I entered the room. He brought his hands back to his neck. "Oh. I didn't hear you come in. How long have you been here?" I looked at the floor." Not long. "Is something wrong?" I shook my head. "I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry I left. I shouldn't have run off like that." "No, It's my fault. I haven't been good to you. But Christal, I'm gonna do better now. I'm not going to hurt you again. I promise." I looked in his eyes and saw he meant it. It really got to him. I walked towards him and hugged him. He froze for a minute, surprised. Then, his arms wrapped around me too. "I love you." He told me. "I know." I answered. That night he cooked dinner for the first time in years. We actually had a conversation, and ate dinner together like a normal family. Plus, we actually laughed.  
That night I sat in my room thinking about what I was going to do, and the day I had. Should I tell him what happened after I left knowing he'd probably blame himself? Or not tell him knowing that if he found out he'd be upset that I kept it from him... I decided I wouldn't tell him just yet. After everything I put him through, I couldn't make it worse. We just made it better. I don't want to ruin it.  
My walk to the lake this morning was again quiet, I couldn't stop thinking about Matt. And the way I wished we'd be okay. Also, I couldn't help thinking about the moment he kissed me. How strangely...perfect it felt. I couldn't possibly have feelings for my best friend. No, that's impossible. He's just playing with my head. That's all. But why didn't I push him away? Why didn't it feel awkward? Maybe I just wasn't thinking right. Nothing made sense to me. I needed someone to talk to. A girl. The one girl I've always known to listen. My best friend.  
"Hey, it's been a while! What's wrong?" "We're still friends right?" "Of course Chris, We've been best friends since third grade, why wouldn't we be?" That seemed somehow surprising. I thought she'd be mad after I quit talking to her and ran off like I did. But maybe she didn't know about the last part, I hardly spent time with her anymore when Trevor came around. "Okay, I replied. "Good." "So what's going on?" She asked, concerned. "Can you meet me at the park? I need to talk to you, besides we haven't hung out in a while." She laughed a little. "Yeah, sure. I'll be there in a few minutes. After we hung up, I walked to the park, which was about ten minutes away from the lake where I was at. When I got there I saw her swinging on the same beat up swing she always sat in. She heard me as I stepped onto the gravel and she turned around. "Hey!" She yelled as she ran and hugged me. "How has everything been?" I shrugged. "Kind of crazy, actually." "Wanna talk about it?" "I'll tell you later." I was happy things with Briah were still okay. I knew even if things got real bad she was still going to listen. She'd been my friend longer than Matt has. "Let's go to my house, I'm freezing." She said. I laughed. "Sounds good."  
Walking in her room felt like I'd just been there yesterday. Nothing changed. "I know it's a mess. I haven't had time to clean it." I smiled, "I don't think I've ever seen it clean." We laughed. "Good point, do you want anything to drink?" I shook my head. "No, I'm fine." "Alright, I'll just bring you whatever I get." I laughed and sat on her bed until she came back, hot cocoa in her hands. "Watch out, it's hot." "I kinda figured." I laughed. We used to do this every day, after school and talk about whatever was going on that week. "So what's bugging you, Chris?" I looked down into my cup. "Matt hates me now, and I don't know what to do." She looked shocked. "What? Matt? He could never hate you? Why would you think that?" She sat next to me. I didn't answer. "Christal, Matt loves you. He always has. There's no possible way he could ever hate you." That confused me. I know he said he loves me, but I didn't know how long he has. "Really?" "Of course, he wanted to tell you. But he was scared you'd turn away from him. He wanted you to be happy and he thought leaving you with Trevor would've let you be just that." Tha'ts why he felt so bad. Why didn't I ever see these things? "Chris, don't feel bad, it's not your fault. You didn't know." "But I should've." She reached over and grabbed my hand. "There's no way you could have." I looked at her. "He told me he loved me when we were gone, Bri. But all I did was stand there. I just..froze." She looked surprised. "Really? He did it, huh? Well, it's about darn time." She smiled. "But, do you feel the same way?" I paused. "I don't know. I mean, he's always been my best friend." She looked at me with a daring expression. "What?" "There's more, isn't there?" I paused. "Well, I don't know. I- I didn't...stop him when he kissed me, I think I almost liked it..." She grinned. "I knew it!" "But it doesn't mean anything. Maybe I was just out of it. I don't know, but it doesn't mean I have feelings for him." She shook her head. "Chris. When will you see it? We all see it." "See what?" "You know what I'm talking about. Remember how you never appoved of his girlfriends? She could be the nicest girl around, and you'd find some flaw about her. You always told him he deserves better. You never knew that the only girl he thought was better than anyone else, was you." "That's not true. I approved of Emily." Briah laughed. "But I don't get it, if I was so important to him, then why is he doing this? Why is he acting like this? I just don't understand." "Well, I have an idea." I looked at her, confused. "What is it?" "We're gonna find out, you're going to talk to him." "What are you talking about, Bri?" "We'll go see him, so you can talk to him. Maybe that's all you guys need." I doubted this idea, but decided it might be worth a try anyway, and agreed to go. "We'll head over tomorrow." She smiled. I wasn't sure how she planned on making this work, but I knew I had to trust her.  
I woke up and immediately went downstairs to find something for breakfast. I was worrying about how today would go. There was no guarantee that he was even going to listen to a thing I said. What would I say when I got there and saw him? How would he react? I needed to prepare for the worst, don't expect too much. "Is something wrong?" I turned and saw my dad facing me, confused. I shook my head. "No, not at all. I have to go soon though, Briah's coming to pick me up, we're gonna go out." He nodded. "Okay, have fun."  
A few minutes later Briah pulled up into the driveway. I tried my best to stay calm, not to get too nervous. "It's gonna be fine, Chris." Bri said as I stepped into the car. "Yeah, I hope so..."  
"I don't know if I can do this." I said as we parked behind his building. "How about you stop worrying so much? It's Matt." "Yeah, easy for you to say..." I said and got out of the car. How could I be calm? What if he doesn't even come to the door, or worse, just shuts the door the moment he sees me? We got to his hallway, and Briah stopped walking. "I'm gonna leave you to do this alone. I'll be at the car." My eyes widened. "But Bri-" "I'll see you in a little bit, good luck." She smiled. "You'll do fine." She said and walked away before I could even stop her. Matts room was just four doors down the hallway, but it felt like miles as I walked slowly. I kept telling myself I can still turn back, I don't have to do this. But something stopped me from running, I needed to see him. I got to his door and froze, like I forgot what to do. After a few seconds I built up the nerve to finally knock. It was quiet, but it sounded to me like it echoed the entire hallway. I stood at the door self consciously, almost feeling like I was being watched. I almost turned around and walked away, but then the door opened.  
The moment I saw him, I was speechless. Looking at him now, I realized how much I missed him. I still wasn't sure about how I felt about him, but all I knew was I wanted him back in my life. I couldn't quite figure out what his expression was. It looked sad, but angry, and careless at the same time, but I felt like there was something I was missing. I just couldn't figure it out. "What are you doing here?" He said in a stern voice. I just stared at him. He started to get impatient. "Okay, fine. Don't answer. Bye." He started to close the door. "Matt-" He paused. "I'm sorry." I said quietly, fighting back the tears that were threatening my eyes. I stared at the ground. He sighed, and stayed silent for a while. "I should've known not to look at your phone, I shouldn't have fought with you, I didn't need to yell at you like I did, I should've-" "What do you think I'm mad at you for, Christal?" He interrupted. I looked at him, confused. "Well, for what I said." "Then you're wrong. And until you figure that out," He breathed. "Just leave me alone." He shut the door. Just like that. Just five minutes, and it was already over. All for nothing. I stood in front of that door, holding back from tears. I couldn't understand what he meant. "Matt, just tell me what I did wrong. I think I deserve to know." He didn't answer. "Whatever I did Matt, I'm sorry." I yelled through the door. I heard the t.v volume get louder. "Fine, Matt. You win. Goodbye." I ran down the hallway and down the stairs, passing Briah. "Chris? Chris, wait! What happened?" I went to the car and stood at the door. My hands over my face. I sat down on the cement. Briah was walking towards me. Worry in her eyes. "Chris? What happened?" She said with a concerned voice. "I don't understand! I don't know him anymore!" I exclaimed. "What do you-" "One minute he's screaming at me for seeing a stupid text, and then he says that that's not even the reason he's mad at me! I don't know what else it could possibly be! I dont get it..." I sobbed. I leaned my head against the window, and we didn't say a word the rest of the way home.  
I didn't go anywhere, or talk to anyone for days. I just wanted to be alone, and figure things out. I wanted to remember what else I'd done wrong. But I couldn't find it. "What's wrong?" My dad asked as we sat at the table for dinner. "Nothing." I feigned a smile. "Talk to me, it's okay. What is it? Is it a boy?" I rolled my eyes. "Just don't worry about it, okay?" He nodded and took a bite of his food. I felt bad for acting this way, but I knew he wouldn't understand, and I just didn't care at the moment.  
I layed in my bed, staring at the ceiling. Still wondering what he was so mad about. I heard someone coming down the hallway, and then a soft knock at the door. "What is it?" I asked, expecting my dad. No answer. I went to the door and opened it. It was Briah. "Oh....hey." I said quietly. She barged into my room and sat on my bed, grabbing my cell phone. "You've been ignoring me for day. Come on Chris. Have you really been sitting in here, feeling bad about something you have no idea you did?" I stayed quiet and looked at the floor as I leaned against the wall. She charged over to my closet, and grabbed my white jacket and dress Matt gave me. She threw them onto the bed. "I know I may seem pushy, but you need out of the house. Let's go." She walked out of the room and yelled, "I don't hear you moving!" I laughed a little bit. Bri was probably the one person who kept me entertained, just simply with her personality. With Bri, you were never bored. I got dressed and walked into the hallway. "Good girl." She teased. I shook my head. I told my father I was leaving and when I got in the car Briah looked at me. "So. What's going on, Chris? Why did you ignore me? I wanted to help. Matt's the one being a jerk." "I'm sorry. I was upset. I didn't really feel like talking to anyone, I hoped you would understand." "Not even to me? Your best friend?" "I said I was sorry. Please, can we move on?" She laughed. "Alright. I forgive you." I smiled. "Thank you. So, where are we going?" She asked as she started the car. "I don't know, you tell me. You're the one who forced ME out of the house AND into a dress." She laughed. "Alright, I know just where to go."  
We pulled into the parking lot and automatically I smiled. "I remember this place." "Well you better. We used to come here all the time." It was the restaurant we used to come to for lunch every weekend. Also, where we'd hang out when she would sneak out of her fathers house. She hated it there. I remember going with her once and he was drunk with some of his friends. Briah kept apologizing to me like it was her fault but I kept telling her everything was fine. She stopped visiting him the next week. "This place brings back so many memories." She said as we stepped in the door. "Yeah, it does." We got a seat by the window and had long conversations catching up on her instead of me this time. I wanted to hear about how she was since I left.On the way home we had more conversations. Mostly memories and how her mom was finally doing better. I was happy things were finally back to normal. Well, almost.  
When we pulled into the driveway we noticed that my dads car wasn't there. "Usually he's home by now." I said to Briah, confused. "Maybe he got held in at work or something." She said reassuringly. I nodded. "Yeah, maybe." She smiled.  
After Briah left I went inside and turned on the TV, eventually falling asleep. But I was woken up by loud knocks on the door. I slowly stood up, and walked to the door, but hesitated when I saw who it was.  
"Christal? Are you home?" They were cops, and not just any cops, they were my dads best friends. Sure, they could've been here for anything, but the looks on their faces told me something had to be wrong and when I opened the door, my assumption was right. "What's going on?" I asked quietly, afraid of the answer. They looked at each other, then back to me. "We need you to come with us." I paused. "Why?" The taller one looked to the ground. "There was an accident..." One guy started to say. "It's your dad, Christal." The other one interrupted. "What happened? Is he okay?" Neither one looked at me. "Well?" "You'll have to see for yourself." Without another word I grabbed my jacket and ran back out the door. "Fine, let's go."  
I bursted through the hospital door almost running into one nurse. "Can I help you?" One of the ladies asked. "My dad. He just came in here not too long ago. He was in an accident? Do you know where he is?" "He just came in here shortly before you did. Have a seat over there, I'll tell you when you can see him." "I need to see him now." I demanded. But all she'd tell me is that I have to wait. "Is he okay?" She didn't answer. "Is he?" "I wouldn't be able to tell you even if I knew." She said calmly. I nodded and took a seat by the window, waiting impatiently.  
"Christal Wilson?" I immediately stood up. I turned to see the doctor in the doorway. He looked exhausted. "Yeah?" He motioned for me to follow him. "You can see him now." I walked shortly behind him, almost beside him. Looking at all the patients and the families in the hallway, some laughing, some crying. A million thoughts were running through my head. I just needed to know he was okay. Suddenly I thought of Matt. He should've been here. He'd usually be her, comforting me. Telling me it's going to be okay. But he's not. And he might not come back.  
When we got to the end of the hallway, the doctor stopped at the door, and told me to go ahead. I hesitated, suddenly scared. I looked at the doctor, then slowly made my way inside the room.  
I quickly stopped at the foot of his bed, staring at all the tubes and bandages. I could hardly recognize him. There was one tube in my mouth, and another on his arm. His arms and face showed multiple bruises and there was a bandage on his forehead. I sat beside him, unable to talk. Again, wishing Matt were here. The doctor came into the room shortly after, looking sympathetic. "He was trapped for a while, when the car flipped. He legs got trapped in the car. They're both broken. And his back was pretty messed up too. So he's gonna have some trouble." "But he's okay, right?" "He's stable. But you should also know that we don't know when he'll wake up." I paused. "What do you mean?" He reached over to fix the IV bag that was almost empty, and then turned back to me. "He's in a coma. And we don't know how long."  
I couldn't speak. I didn't know what to think, what to say. I felt like running, but at the same time I wanted to stay. "I'm sure he'll wake up soon though, he's strong." The nurse said as she came in, smiling a little. "Just be positive." I nodded. "But, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave. It's getting late. But you're welcome to come in tomorrow morning of course." "I can't, I can't just leave him already." She looked at me sympathetically. "We gotta get him ready for tomorrow, we're gonna try and fix up his back." She pulled the blanket up a little bit to cover his arms. "I'll give you a few more minutes though." She smiled and left the room.  
I turned to look at my dad. He looked peaceful, like nothing even happened. Hopefully he felt like that too. I squeezed his hand, kissed his forehead, and walked towards the door when the nurse came in. "Can you call me before his surgery tomorrow? I want to be here when he comes out." "It might take a few hours, are you sure you wanna wait that long?" I nodded. "I don't care how long it takes." She smiled. "Alright." She said softly and then said goodbye.  
The house felt empty, almost lonely, since I knew my dad wasn't going to be there. I went straight upstairs to try to sleep, but I couldn't. It was too quiet, too empty. So I grabbed the phone and dialed for Briah.  
The moment she answered the phone she knew something was wrong. I told her about the accident and waited for her car to pull up to the driveway.  
"I'm so sorry, Chris." I shook my head. "He'll be okay, I know it. He has to be." She looked at me and forced a small smile. "Can you take me to the hospital tomorrow morning? I want to be there before he goes into surgery." She nodded. "Yeah, sure. Of course."

Surgery Day-

"Want something to eat before you leave?" "Uh, no thanks. I gotta go. I'll eat later." She shook her head. "Alright. But why are you in such a hurry? Why don't you wait til he is out?" "Maybe he'll wake up today." I replied. "Chris-" "I'll talk to you later." I interrupted, and rushed out of the door.  
When I got there the doctors were getting him ready to go. "Can I just have a few minutes with him first?" The two nurses looked at each other and the one from yesterday nodded. "Hey, Dad. Today you're gonna go in for your back. Be strong though. I know you can be. I wish I could've prevented this from happening to you. I wish there was something I could've done. But I guess there's nothing I can do." I grabbed his hand. "They probably aren't going to give me much time with you. They have to get you fixed up. You'll be okay. I know you will." The nurse came in to motion that it was time to go. "Okay, I have to go. Just do me a favor, okay? Wake up for me. Soon." I said quietly and left the room.  
"Hey!" I looked down the hallway, confused. Briah came strolling down, holding a cup of coffee in each hand. "Thought you might need this." She said and smiled. "Thanks." "When will he be out?" I shrugged. "So far it's been two hours. Hopefully not too much longer." She nodded. "Hopefully." A few minutes later I saw one of the doctors coming down the hallway. I stood up. "How is he? Is he okay? Is he awake?" He took off his gloves and sighed. "He's fine, but no he's not awake yet. Like I said, we don't know when that'll be." "Yeah, I know." I said, disappointed. "There's something else isn't there?" I asked quietly. "Yeah. His back will be okay, but it's gonna take a long time to heal. We don't know if he's gonna be able to walk. If he does, it won't be very well." I sat back down. "I gotta go. You can see your father soon." I nodded. "Okay." I whispered.  
After visiting with my dad, I decided to take a trip to the place I always escaped to. Mine and Matts hideout. By the lake. I found the bench beside our tree looked for the spot Matt carved. I needed something to distract me from all of this. I sat down at the bench by the lake and stared out at the water. I started to think about Matt again. Playing around by that lake, the conversations, the comfort. But most importantly, I kept replaying the time he kissed me. I couldn't forget about it, and at the same time I wished I could. I regretted ever fighting with him. I wish it never happened. All the memories just down the drain, because of one argument. Suddenly a noise distracted my thoughts. It sounded like a branch snapped. I turned around to see what it was but figured it was just a small animal or something so I turned back around and then backed away so fast I hardly realized I moved. I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

"Where are you going?"  
"It doesn't matter, I just need to see someone. I made a terrible mistake."  
"What are you talking about? Matt, talk to me. Please."  
I shook my head. "I can't. You wouldn't understand."  
Ever since I left her I couldn't get her out of my mind. I should never have shut the door on her like that. I needed to see her. I needed to tell her how sorry I was. I don't know how I could just hurt her like I did. I'm supposed to be there for her. I'm supposed to protect her. Not hurt her. "Matt, please." I ignored her and kept getting ready. She stood in my doorway with her arms crossed.  
"There's another girl isn't there?" She said quietly, with her head down. Accusation in her voice.  
"Jen, don't. Don't start this right now."  
"It makes sense doesn't it? You hardly even look at me. We've been together for seven months and no matter how many times I tell you how I feel you just brush it off like an every day conversation. Like you don't even care."  
"I'm not doing this right now. Just let it go."  
"Matt, please. Just talk to me. Tell me what is going on. I need to know." I could see the tears forming.  
"Don't go." She whispered, and then walked towards me. "I love you."  
I turned around and looked at her for a short second and then walked past her. "I have to go. Goodbye Jen."  
I opened the door and before I could close it all the way she stopped me.  
"Matt, just tell me one thing. Is there someone else? Tell me the truth" I could see the pain in her eyes. I didn't want to hurt her, but I couldn't lie anymore.  
"Yes." I whispered, and walked away.  
I felt bad for hurting her. I did care for her, but not the same way I cared for Christal. I couldn't stand the guilt anymore. Before I left the parking lot I dialed her number but only got her voicemail. After she didn't answer the next two times I called Briah who, like usual, answered on the first ring.  
"Matt? I'm so glad it's you. Chris is gone. She went out for a walk a few hours ago, but I thought she'd be back at the hospital by now but she won't answer her phone either."  
"Hospital?"  
"Yeah. Didn't you hear? Her dad was in an accident."  
"Is he okay?"  
"I'll explain later. Can you come home?"  
"Yeah of course. I'm on my way."  
I set the phone next to me and drove away as soon as we hung up. I needed to get there fast. 

When I got to Briah she ran and hugged me. "I'm so glad you're here. Maybe she'll come back if she knows you're here." I shook my head. "I doubt that, Bri. I was a jerk." She let go and looked at me. "She won't admit it to anyone, but I can tell she needs you. She doesn't talk to me the way she talks to you. You made her happy. You can make her feel at least a little better." I looked at the ground. "Sure."  
Briah's mom started to come around the corner. "Have you found her?" She asked. "No, I looked everywhere." Bri said, exhausted. Suddenly a thought occured to me. I remembered our spot. The place she always went to. "Wait. I'll be back in a little bit."  
"You know where she is?"  
"I might." Bri looked at me, confused.  
"I want to come."  
"No, stay here. Trust me."  
I hurried to my car and drove off. I was worried. Chris doesn't usually run off like this. Especially with her dad hurt. Something had to be wrong. 

I walked slowly into the woods, hoping I'd find her here. Maybe she just got lost in her thoughts and forgot the time. Then I heard her voice. She sounded scared. And when I heard the other one, I knew exactly who it was. She was close enough to me so I could hear everything, but far enough so she couldn't see me.  
"What are you doing here?" She demands. Her voice shaky.  
"What do you think I'm doing here Christal? I came for you. I told you I would." He started to walk towards her, but every time he took a step forward, she took two steps back. I could see the fear in her eyes. I could hear it in her voice.  
"Leave me alone." She took another step backwards. She was trapped now. He managed to corner her.  
"Please don't act like that. Chris I really am sorry."  
"Don't call me that." She gave him a cold glare, making it obvious she didn't want him around her. He put his hands against the tree so her head was between them.  
"Please believe me, I am sorry. I love you."  
"No you don't!" She yelled and ducked under his arm. She started to run but he grabbed her wrist. I could tell she made him mad. I wanted to run out and help, but I needed space between them first. I didn't want to take the risk of startling him into hurting her.  
"Let me go." She pulled her arm to try and get away but his grip was too tight. "Let go! Stop this!" She finally got her arm free and pushed him. When he got off the ground he started towards her again but I wasn't going to let him do anything. I couldn't watch anymore. I had to do something. As soon as his arms stretched out to her, I ran out and grabbed the collar of his shirt, pushing him to the tree. "Don't you ever touch her again, got it? I even see you come near her and you're gonna regret even thinking about it." I turned around to see where Christal was. She was by the bushes on the other side, partially hiding. She must've seen me.  
"Let me go." He said through clenched teeth. I let go of his shirt and watched him walk towards her. I ran in between them. "Wrong way." He glared at me, then at Christal. I almost grabbed him again, I wanted to do more. I wanted to hurt him like he hurt her. But I knew she wouldn't want that.  
After he was out of sight I waited to hear his car start and then looked at Chris. She looked terrified. A tear was already starting to fall down her cheek. I rushed towards her, wrapping my arms around her waist, half expecting her to push me away but to my surprise she didn't. Instead she buried her face into my chest, sobbing, "I'm so sorry, Chris." I whispered.  
I drove her home and went to the kitchen to grab something for her to drink. I asked if she wanted anything to eat but there was no answer. After a few minutes I came back out to the living room. She was sitting on the couch, staring at the floor.  
"Chris? Are you okay?" I asked and walked toward her. She didn't reply. I sat down beside her.  
"He's still here." She whispered. "I know it."  
I moved her hair behind her ears.  
"He won't hurt you again. I'll make sure of that." She didn't say anything.  
"I thought I lost you, Matt." She whispered and looked to the floor.  
I nodded. "I did too." I said. "But I'm not going anywhere. Not again. This time you're stuck with me. I made a mistake, Chris. I should've never done that to you. I had no right to be mad at you, and I'm sorry." She put her head on my shoulder.  
"Promise?"  
I smiled. "Promise." 

"How is she? Is she okay? Where did you find her?" Briah asked as soon as I opened the door.  
"She's fine. A little shaken up, but she's doing okay. Trevor had her." She shook her head.  
"I wanna see her." Bri demanded.  
"She's asleep, so you wanna wait with me?"  
Bri nodded. "Sounds good. I'm surprised she even slept."  
We walked into the living room and sat on the couch. Bri across from me.  
"How is she doing?" Bri asked.  
"She's alright. She was pretty scared, but I think she was more exhausted than anything."  
Briah nodded, "Yeah, that's understandable. She's hardly slept since the accident."  
I stayed silent.  
"Matt, she really missed you."  
I looked up at her, then back to the ground. "Yeah, I missed her too."  
"Why'd you do it? Why'd you hurt her like that?"  
I could have answered her, but there wasn't really an answer. I didn't even know why I got so angry. "I don't know, I guess I was just angry because even though I should have expected the outcome, a part of me seemed shocked, surprised that she didn't feel the same, hurt, I don't really know. But I wish I never did it. I wish I would have been here to protect her, and be here for her when she needed me most."  
Briah walked over and sat next to me.  
"Matt, you might think she doesn't feel that way, and she may say it too. But I can see it. I can see that she does. I know she does. There's something about the way she looks at you, and talks about you. I don't think even she realizes how much she actually cares. You hurt her a lot. She didn't even want to talk to me after what you did, but she still forgave you. That has to mean something. Maybe she doesn't see it, or maybe she just won't admit it to herself, but I do. And I see the way you look at her, the way you always have. I know you regret it, but it's okay now, and I'm glad you're back. She needs you. I'm also thankful you found her. I don't know what would have happened if it weren't for you." She smiled.  
I put an arm around her, hugging her. "I'm glad I'm back too, Bri." I replied.  
Shortly after, we heard footsteps upstairs.  
"Sounds like she's awake." I said and sat up. Briah got up from the couch and walked towards the stairs around the same time Chris got to the bottom.  
"Morning." I said as she looked over. She gave a small, tired smile.  
"I made breakfast, if you want some."  
She nodded. "Okay."  
"I'll take you to see your dad afterwards, okay?" Briah said to her. Again, Chris nodded. Christal didn't talk much all through breakfast, it was like she was completely lost in her thoughts, but still listened to what we were saying. I knew she was probably thinking about yesterday, so I didn't say anything about it.  
"You ready to go?" Briah asked Chris.  
Chris nodded. "Yeah. Just let me get ready." After she ran back up the stairs Briah turned to me.  
"Do you want to come?"  
I shook my head. "No, I'll pick her up. Just call me when she's ready to come home."  
Bri smiled. "Okay. And thanks for everything Matt. You might have saved her life."  
I nodded. "I know, and one more thing."  
She looked at me, confused. "Yeah?"  
"Don't let her out of your sight again."  
She nodded in agreement.  
"I'm not a kid, Matt. I can take care of myself. I appreciate your concern, but I don't need you here to watch my every move." Chris said as she came down the stairs.  
"I'm just trying to watch out for you." I told her.  
"Yeah. Well, be a little. . . I don't know, calm about it?" Briah tried to force back a smile, but didn't really succeed.  
I nodded. "I'll try."  
She shook her head and walked towards the door. "Let's go." She said to Briah. She opened the door and headed out, but before the door closed Chris caught it and walked back to me.  
"Did you forget something?" I asked her.  
She shook her head and came closer.  
"Thank you." She whispered and her arms slipped around my waist, her head on my chest. I held her closer, wondering what this meant. "I really am glad you're back." She said quietly.  
"Yeah. So am I." I replied, kissing the top of her head before letting her go. She smiled at me, and then walked out.  
I knew it was going to be difficult, staying with her. I loved her in a way I couldn't expect back. She was someone you couldn't explain, you couldn't read. I knew her better than anyone, but still had trouble completely understanding her. There was nobody like her, nobody that could compare to her, and as much as I loved her, and wished she felt the same, I knew I couldn't expect anything. In her eyes, I'm just her best friend. Which, I knew, was better than nothing.  
I sat in my bedroom, staring at my own reflection in the mirror. Matt and Briah were waiting for me downstairs. We were throwing a party for my Dad's home coming, and Briah already had everything set up. I could hear them talking quietly to each other and every once in a while one of them would shout for me to hurry up and then they would both laugh. I looked over at the gift I had wrapped for my dad, and then back to the mirror. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Matt was supposed to be my best friend, I can't just change that. Everything was getting confusing. Briah told me that I needed to confront him, but I just couldn't work up the courage. I couldn't risk changing things. The idea had been wrestling around in my mind for days now and it wasn't really getting any easier. So I came up with a solution to avoid feeling that way around him. I would just have to keep Briah around. As long as I avoid any possibility of being alone with him, I could avoid the feelings. I hoped.  
"Well it's about time." Briah said to me as I walked down the stairs. Matt was staring at me, but I avoided eye contact and continued towards Bri. She looped her arm through mine and then walked towards the living room. "So, you and Matt are going to go pick him up while I wait here and set everything up. Is that okay with you?" Briah asked.  
"Um, actually, I was thinking Matt could pick up my Dad, and I'd just stick around and help." She gave me a confused look and then nodded. "Alright." She said and looked at Matt. "Guess it's just me then. I'll see you guys in a little bit." He said and then walked out the door.  
"What's going on?" Briah asked me. I shrugged. "Nothing. Just thought I'd help you out." I got up and walked towards the kitchen. "No, I don't think that's it. You won't even look at him."  
"I don't know, I guess I'm just nervous."  
"About your dad? Come on, Chris. I know you better than that."  
"It's nothing." I insisted.  
She shook her head. "You're lying. I can tell."  
I paused, and looked down at the floor, then back to her. She put her arm around my shoulders. "Talk to me. You know you can tell me anything."  
"He's my friend." I said. Bri nodded.  
"Yes. He is. So what's the problem?"  
"That IS the problem. He's my friend. I should not feel like this about a friend, Bri. I can't. There's too much history, too much to lose."  
"And who says you'll lose him?"  
"I just know it. Friendships that turn into relationships just don't work. It just ruins everything. I'd rather have him here, as a friend, than to lose him completely."  
"You won't."  
"How do you know?"  
She let go of me and sat up on the counter. "Christal, we both have known him for years. and we both know that he loves you. That is why he chases you, that is why he saves you every time there's trouble. That is why he is always, always there for you no matter how much it hurts him. I think you owe it to the guy to just give him a chance."  
I didn't reply. She was right, he's been there through everything, but it scared me.  
"Chris?" She said, interrupting my thoughts.  
"Yeah."  
"Tell him."  
She got down off the counter and then walked back into the living room to set up the decorations. I just stood there, unable to think of what to do. 

"They're here!" Briah exclaimed. I finished topping the cake and ran into the living room. We waited impatiently for them to come through the door and when the door finally opened, I felt my stomach drop. There was someone else with them. Some girl, holding Matt's hand. I took a breath and looked away before Matt noticed, and hugged my Dad. We spent a few hours talking and I served everyone food. Bri was talking with Matt's new girlfriend, and they were laughing at Matt as he sat there trying not to smile. I looked away again. Careful not to make anybody think I was upset, I had no right to be. Matt didn't belong to me, and that was my own fault. I just had to deal with it.  
A few hours later we all gathered in the dining room for cake, and my dad made his speech about how happy he was to be home. When Matt and the girl came in they were laughing together again. Briah was looking at me with her concerned expression. I just shrugged my shoulders then I excused myself to go outside for a few minutes. Seeing them together bothered me more than it should have. I sat on the porch swing staring out at the stars as I remembered back when he admitted his feelings and I didn't even say anything back. I just let it all slip through my hands, and now it was too late.  
A few moments later I heard the door squeak open. Expecting Briah, I turned my head to look. It was Matt, he just stood there for a few seconds and then came to sit next to me. "Is something wrong?" He asked, worried. I shook my head without saying anything. He tried to grab my hand but I gently pulled away. He looked at me even more confused. "What's going on, Chris? You haven't spoken to me all day, haven't even looked at me... and now I can't even hold your hand? What did I do?" I folded my hands in my lap and looked to the ground, scared to say anything. "Christal?" He said impatiently. "Please talk to me. If I did something wrong just tell me." I shook my head.  
"You didn't do anything wrong." I whispered.  
"Then why have you been avoiding me?"  
I shrugged. "I don't know." I said quietly.  
"Chris, I know you better than anyone. Something is bothering you. Just tell me."  
"I can't."  
"Why not?"  
"I just can't, okay?"  
He sighed and turned more towards me. "You're keeping something from me, I don't understand. We used to tell each other everything. What changed?"  
I didn't say anything. I glanced up at him, then back down and shook my head.  
"Fine. You know what, I don't care anymore. I don't understand what I've done to you to deserve this, but whatever. I'll just go home."  
He stood up to leave and before I could stop myself, I stood up too.  
"Who is she?" I asked.  
He turned around again. "Who?"  
"Don't play dumb with me, Matt. Who is she? The girl you brought here. Who is she?"  
"She's a friend from school, why?"  
"Holding your hand?"  
He nodded. "Well, yeah. I asked her to come so she could meet you and Briah, she was scared you wouldn't like her. She was nervous so I held her hand to let her know I was there. Just like I've done with you. Why? What does it matter?"  
I shrugged. "I don't know. Nevermind."  
"Stop doing that. Just tell me what is on your mind. What is bothering you? Do you not like her?"  
"It's not that." I said quietly.  
"Then what?"  
When I didn't reply he walked towards me a little bit and rubbed his hand through his hair. "I don't get it Chris. One minute you're my best friend, and the next you're acting like you don't even know me. I don't understand."  
I looked up at him but didn't say anything.  
"Don't do this to me! Don't just close up like this."  
"Are you sure you two are only friends?" I asked him.  
"Yes. Why does it matter to you anyway? You rejected me. I told you how I felt, and you blew it off. You made it very clear that you don't feel the same about me so I backed off. I left you alone."  
I nodded. "I know." I whispered.  
"Then why this?!" He yelled. "Why are you so upset? Why won't you talk to me? What is it? I came back because you needed my help, if you don't need me around anymore..."  
I looked up again. "No, no I'm not saying that."  
"Then what are you saying?"  
"I can't tell you."  
"Why not?"  
"Because you were right! I did blow you off. I did push you away. It was my fault. Everything was. I can't ruin it again."  
"Again? What are you talking about?"  
"This. Us. I can't risk losing it..."  
"Why would you? I'm not going anywhere." He said softly, and put held onto my arms. "Chris, I meant what I told you that day. Even if you don't feel the same, I will always be here for you."  
I nodded. "I know."  
"Then why are you saying this?"  
"Because I know how these things end, Matt. The friends who inevitably fall for each other, then they decide to try a relationship and there's so much history they just break up. And then they don't just lose the relationship, they lose the friendship too. The history and the memories, everything. They just kind of forget about each other..."  
He had a confused expression on his face for a moment and I just stared down at my feet.  
"I'm confused. What does that have to do with us?"  
I stayed silent.  
"Wait.. are you saying..."  
"I don't know what I'm saying. Maybe this is just stupid. I shouldn't have even-" Before I could say anything he had his hands around my face, and started to move in closer to me. He gently lifted my head up towards his. Everything around me just seemed to disappear, I could feel my heart beating against my chest, my hands were shaking and the moment his lips touched mine, everything just stopped.


End file.
